Do this now
- Stop trying to settle who is right. Notice whether they are frightened, upset or angry, and respond to that first.
- Deal with one issue at a time. Speak slowly and keep your voice down when things become heated.
- Pause if the pressure is rising. If it is safe to do so, agree to talk later rather than carrying on while either of you is getting more upset.[1]
If you have already challenged what they believe
This part is about beliefs or perceptions you don't share, including paranoia or psychosis. It draws on guidance for those experiences; it doesn't mean every disagreement is a symptom.
You may have argued with every point, lost your temper or told them they were being ridiculous. If you regret how you spoke, apologise for that part. You can take their fear seriously while being honest that you see the situation differently.
Then offer a choice: would they like some space, company or help contacting someone they trust? They do not have to accept your apology or agree with you before you can stop the argument. Do not dismiss a report of harm simply because someone has a mental-health diagnosis.
If you need to stop
You can say that you are too upset to continue and, if you can, suggest when you will return to the conversation. Do not promise a time you cannot manage. If the issue can wait, leave it there.
Threats, abuse or immediate danger need a different response. See the anger and safety guide, or use urgent help if someone may be unsafe.
And you?
Trying to stay calm all the time is tiring, and you will not always manage it. Support for you can help.
Sources and how this guide was written
Do this now
Mind's psychosis guidance and its paranoia guidance explain how to take the person's distress seriously without pretending to share a belief.
Last full source check: 27 August 2026
Later checks: Editorial changes checked against the linked guidance: 1 October 2026.
Independent information, not a medical or crisis service. This guidance has not been clinically reviewed. How we use sources.
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