Do not make agreement the price of staying closeRepeat what you have noticed without arguing about a label. Offer one practical next step and keep ordinary contact going.
Act on urgent change. Call 999 if someone's life is at risk. For worsening physical health in England, call NHS 111 or contact their GP. For urgent mental-health help, call their existing crisis team if they have one, or use the service and number shown for their UK nation.
What you can do
- Keep observations factual. Note changes, dates and their effect on daily life.
- Offer a small step. This might be helping book a GP appointment or sitting with them while they call.
- Ask what makes help feel difficult. Listen for fear, shame, previous experiences or practical barriers.
- Get advice yourself. Beat can support family and friends even when the person is not using its services.
- Return to the conversation. A refusal today does not have to end the subject.
Source: Beat
What to avoid
- Trying to win an argument about whether they are ill.
- Making promises of secrecy about serious risk.
- Using appearance or weight as proof that they are fine or unwell.
- Taking sole responsibility for monitoring and safety.
If services refuse an assessment
NICE says treatment decisions should not be based on a single measure such as body mass index or duration of illness. Ask for the decision and reason in writing, and use new dated information if the situation changes.
Source: NICE
This page organises public guidance from the linked organisations; it has not been clinically reviewed by Here for Someone.
Sources checked: 27 August 2026
← Eating-disorder overview