Here for someone

Bipolar · Refusing help

They do not want help

You can keep communication open, offer practical routes and pass factual concerns to services even if they disagree with you.

Work with what they will discussDo not make agreement about bipolar the condition of your support. Start with something they recognise, such as sleep, money, conflict or feeling overwhelmed.

You can encourage an adult, but usually cannot make them accept assessment or treatment. You can still share concerns and seek advice. How consent works and what happens if help is urgent.

If you think they may be experiencing mania or severe depression, seek an urgent specialist mental-health assessment. Contact their team, ask for an urgent GP appointment, or use the urgent help for their UK nation. Do not wait for agreement about a diagnosis. Call 999 if there is immediate danger.[1]

Describe what you have noticed

Bipolar UK says someone experiencing mania may have little insight into how vulnerable or unwell they are. Avoid trying to win an argument about diagnosis. Give one or two observable changes and ask about their priorities.

Stay with the facts“You've slept very little for four nights and spent much more than usual. What feels most difficult to you right now?”

[2]

Find something they want help with

  • Contact their existing mental-health team together.
  • Ask for a GP appointment about sleep or another concern they accept.
  • Use the urgent help for their UK nation if help cannot wait. You can call even if they do not agree to join you.
  • Ask whether they will agree to one practical safeguard already discussed in a calmer period.
Lower the argument“We don't have to agree on what this is. Would you speak to someone about the sleep and let me come with you?”

Give information to services

Contact the existing team, GP or urgent service with specific facts: sleep, spending, driving, threats, unusual beliefs, medication changes, substances and how quickly things have changed. Confidentiality may limit what staff tell you, but it does not prevent them from listening.

Confidentiality: what you can tell the care team and what they may share.

[3]

What to avoid saying

  • “You're manic. You cannot trust anything you think.” Describe the change you have observed instead.
  • “If you refuse help, I'm done with you.” State a genuine boundary without using treatment as punishment.
  • “Fine, do whatever you want.” If there is urgent risk, use professional help rather than withdrawing in anger.

Keep your own limits

You cannot provide assessment or treatment yourself. Mind recommends setting boundaries and sharing the caring role where possible.

[4]

Related help
Find the right serviceWhen services say noUnderstand mental capacity
Set a boundarySupport for youBipolar peer support
Sources and how this guide was written

  1. Opening advice

    NICE CG185: when urgent specialist assessment is needed (recommendation 1.2.2).

    Back to the advice

  2. Describe what you have noticed

    Bipolar UK: signs and symptoms and Rethink: supporting someone with mental illness.

    Back to the advice

  3. Give information to services

    NHS England guidance on involving carers and GOV.UK SHARE guidance.

    Back to the advice

  4. Keep your own limits

    Mind and Bipolar UK.

    Back to the advice

Last full source check: 27 August 2026

Consent and seeking advice wording checked: 7 October 2026. Sources and explanation.

Later checks: Help-route wording checked: 1 October 2026.

Independent information, not a medical or crisis service. This guidance has not been clinically reviewed. How we use sources.

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