Here for someone

Depression · What you are noticing

Could this be depression?

This page can help you organise what you have noticed. It cannot diagnose the person.

The short answerDepression is one possible explanation for withdrawal, exhaustion, hopelessness or struggling with ordinary tasks. Other causes are possible.
Immediate danger? If someone's life is at risk or you cannot keep them safe, call 999 or go to A&E. I'm worried they may be suicidal.
Sources: NHS
NHS symptoms of depression and NHS urgent-help guidance.

Are they under 18? This guide is about supporting an adult. See NHS support for children and young people. If you are under 18 and supporting someone else, see young-carer rights and support.

Changes you might notice

Over a period of weeks, they may:

  • seem persistently low, empty, numb or irritable
  • lose interest or pleasure in things they usually enjoy
  • have very little energy
  • sleep or eat much more or less than usual
  • struggle to concentrate, decide or remember
  • avoid people, messages, work or ordinary responsibilities
  • neglect their appearance, home, meals or health
  • speak with intense guilt, hopelessness or self-criticism
  • move or speak more slowly, or seem unusually restless
  • talk about being a burden, having no future or not wanting to be alive

You do not need to wait until every sign is present before starting a conversation. This is not a Here for Someone diagnostic checklist.

Source: NHS
The signs above are paraphrased from NHS symptoms of depression.

They cannot simply snap out of it

The NHS describes depression as a real illness. Encouragement can help, but pressure and blame can make it harder to speak honestly.

Start with a question rather than a diagnosis. Mind suggests:

Mind suggests“How are you managing?”
Sources: NHS and Mind
NHS depression overview and Mind's guidance.

Signs that point to a different or more urgent route

Very little sleep with unusually high energyFast speech, racing thoughts, impulsive spending, grand plans or behaviour that is very unlike them. Hearing, seeing or strongly believing things others do notMarked suspicion, hearing voices, seeing things or beliefs that are affecting safety. Sudden confusion or physical illnessA rapid change, collapse, severe dehydration, injury or other physical symptoms may need urgent medical help. Suicidal thoughts or immediate dangerAsk clearly if you are worried. Call 999 if someone's life is at risk.
Source basis: NHS
NHS depression guidance, NHS psychosis guidance and NHS urgent-help guidance. Here for Someone is not deciding which condition the person has.

What to do next

  1. Tell them what you have noticed.
  2. Ask how they have been feeling.
  3. Listen without diagnosing or arguing.
  4. Offer one manageable form of help.
  5. Encourage professional support if the changes are persistent, severe or affecting everyday life.
Sources: Mind and NHS
Mind and NHS depression guidance.
How to talk to themHelp them get professional support

Here for Someone is an independent information project. It is not a helpline or medical service. This page organises public guidance from the organisations linked beside the relevant information; it has not been clinically reviewed by Here for Someone.

Sources checked: 26 August 2026

← Depression overview